My Nan will be moving into a senior citizen home come the first of the month. It is a place where other seniors can hang out. The village she currently lives in is sort of like that but she doesn’t really interact with anyone. For over thirty years she rarely spoke to my father and no she thinks that he will drop everything to help her. She called me on Monday, she wanted me to call my Dad and give him the message that Nov. 1st is the date. While she was on the phone Evelyn was crying and I told/shouted that I couldn’t phone him. She would have to do it. The same excuse every single time came up, “He’ll be at work.” I fire back with, “leave a message!!!” For the past 25 years message machines have been in existence. Get this she had left me a message just 20 minutes before. I then remembered that she is lazy and doesn’t want to do it. I had told her that Dad cannot fly out to her again. Money is tight, and he is working. She has never offered once to pay him. I told her that if she needs him that she needs to arrange for a ticket. She can have the solicitor help but she won’t do it.
A while ago she had asked me if there was anything of hers that I wanted. In their home for as long as I can remember there was a painting. I asked if I could have it and she had said yes. Now this painting is becoming a contested item. The last time my Dad was over she said she wanted to take it with her. That is fine with me, she can burn it for all I care. However, today she mentioned, “well your dad has to come over to get the painting.” I said, “Dad will be in Atlanta the first week of November. You can send it[the painting] through the mail, the solicitor can help you, the people coming to organize your furniture can help you.” Again the bullshit, “I’m too old! Can’t get it weighed.” Then I got this gem, “Don’t be so demanding, my head is funny I can’t take it!”
I calmly tell her, “I’m trying to help you.” She asked about her jewellery and I mentioned that Neil might like to have granddads wedding band and pocket watch. “I’ll just sell it and give him the money.” This is her stock answer. She is not really interested in an answer to question she asks. Kind of like someone who asks for advice but never takes it, (Why the Fuck do you ask then! Have a bloody conversation with a mirror!!!)
I was able to tell her that British daylight savings ends this Sunday since she had no clue. Last week I sent some monogrammed envelopes and stationary to her so she could write. I asked if she had gotten my package and she said yes but she wasn’t very pleased. She said she would just phone people to tell them her new address and perhaps write Christmas cards for the others. Lindylu44 wrote about not wanting to be labeled and I can empathize. I am the only one that writes her letters or phones I even send her pictures. I do this not out of fear of punishment or want of reward but because I believe it is right. Yet despite this my Nan has a go at me! (I not respecting my elders, and why don’t I live closer to help) I can’t believe that I have let her get me this upset. Let October be over and let it all be done.