Safety Net or Straight Jacket?

Warning ahead lies my own take on my own question which some may find offensive.

Familial support when does it become restrictive?

Over the past few months there have been many television shows devoted to the “Teen Mother Crisis”.  Many of these shows depict the teenage girl who has gotten knocked up.  What peaked my curiosity are the families.  The girl, and I do mean girl, stays with her own family to “raise” the child with help from the now grandparents.

What I found distressing is most of the new moms virtually thrust their children at their “Grandma’s” and then get indignant when Grandma doesn’t provide money or services such as free childcare.

My question is for the familial caretakers.  What limits should be set?

If you had an unwed Mom in your family whether it be a teen or thirty year old what are the limitations you would set?  Could you have the balls set your own limits while incurring the wrath of the surrounding family who berate you for not putting family first?  On television and in actual reality I see family members who overextend themselves caring for grandchildren, nieces, nephews and cousins because if they don’t they will receive family chastisement or damn near banishment.

My other thought is that if if the “safety net” was to be reduced (Notice I put reduced not eliminated) would that increase the responsibility of the actual parent(s)?


2 thoughts on “Safety Net or Straight Jacket?

  1. Another question to be raised is whether the safety net is there for the safety of the child (the unwed or wed mother is indulging in life-threatening activities) or if it exists to provide support for a mom who just doesn’t have it together because she’s (a) too young or (b) unmarried.

  2. While that is valid question I’m reminded of something I heard. “The same law that protects a woman’s right to be a Mother demands she be one once the baby is born.” Otherwise other alternatives must be found and while the musical chair safety net can function I do not know how long it can be maintained/sustained.

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